Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
