: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Alive.
So much puke
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
