He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
