According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
