STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Randomize