At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I think my nap took me to another dimension
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize