I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Green mimosas i think yes
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
