You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize