Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
