You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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