My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
