i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize