In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
