god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
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