I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
i think im in europe. pls send help
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize