I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Randomize