So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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