I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
