Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
