id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I came so hard my ears popped.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
