so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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