I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Randomize
