Do you still have your period?
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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