Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
