I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
