69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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