He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Randomize
