PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
True college students do jello shots in the library
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
