Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
It's blow job season.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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