just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
