But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize