He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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