he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
