I showed him my bush... on skype.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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