I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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