If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
