Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Randomize
