there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
