HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
