Porn is love you can see.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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