I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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