I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
So many bounce houses so little time
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
