I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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