i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize