I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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