my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
