Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize