EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Randomize