you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
