I wannas sexs uuuuu
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize